Condoms (4/18)
by Lola

e-mail: lolabeegood@gmail.com

Time: Set during and post-The Truth.
Spoilers: Everything up to the end of the series.
Summary: Mulder hates condoms for more than the obvious reasons.
Overall Rating: NC-17

I do not own the characters.  I do not make any money from this.
Enjoy!

**

Scully emerged from her shower wrapped tightly in a towel to find 
Mulder sitting on the bed holding his face in his hands.  Before 
opening her mouth to ask what was the matter she glanced around 
to see a large box of dented condoms sitting on the floor by 
the door.

"Why didn't you stop me?" he asked from behind his hands.

"You talk as if I had no say Mulder.  Please remember that I 
was there too" she countered as she crossed toward him and 
placed a gentle hand on his head.

"Why didn't we stop? I forgot.  I honestly did Scully" he said 
from behind pleading eyes as he raised his face to her.

"Maybe I wanted to forget for a moment too Mulder" she replied 
as she sat next to him and took one of his hands into her lap.

"I don't understand Scully."

"Mulder, I got into that shower to help you...relieve some 
tension" she bowed her head as she spoke "but once things got 
going I found it harder and harder to resist.  I really 
wanted you as much as you wanted me.  I missed having you 
inside me as much as you missed being there.  When you 
started to talk about how much you wanted me, needed me, 
dreamt about this moment all the months we were away from 
each other well...how could I?  How could I stop it? How 
could remind you of ..." she couldn't finish the sentence.

"William."

"Yes."

"You wanted to forget?"

"Just for a moment.  I wanted to not think about why we had 
to use birth control---to prevent what I wanted  more than 
anything in the world, had, and gave up.  We can't ever get 
pregnant again Mulder.  I can't go through that, I won't.  
But in that moment with you I just wanted to forget."

"What do we do now Scully?"

"I'm going to look and see if there is a free clinic in the 
phone book.  I'll see if I can anonymously get a morning after 
pill or even a package of birth control pills.  I can give 
myself a double dose and it'll have the affect of a morning 
after pill.  If those aren't available we'll just have to see.  
But it's not my ovulation time so I really don't think there 
is much risk." she looked at him sincerely "Honestly, I don't.  
But if I turn out to be pregnant I won't have that baby." 

Mulder placed his other hand on top of Scully's and squarely 
looked her in the eye. "I support whatever you want to do 
Scully.  But you are right, we need to use birth control 
from now on.  It's not worth the risk."

"For an MD I've been pretty stupid about birth control" she 
chastised herself.

"Before..." he started "before William we didn't know it 
could happen.  That's not stupid, it's just a fact.  Then, 
when I came back and you were pregnant why would we need 
birth control?  The deed was done."

Scully chuckled at the remembrance of the few times they 
had engaged in awkward late stage pregnancy 
sex.

"Now, we screwed up in the heat of the moment, but I promise 
you we won't screw up again.  I'd say, compared to most people 
we have taken far fewer risks" he ended with a pat on her hand

"Thanks for the pep talk Mulder" she said as she shoved her 
shoulder into the side of his.

With the talk came forgiveness.  Forgiveness of themselves, 
forgiveness of each other.  Mulder stood to get dressed and 
walked over to pick up the box.  

"Large enough pack Scully? How much action do you expect?" 
he commented trying to lighten the mood.

"That's just one box.  You haven't found the others?" she 
asked as she rose from the bed and padded into the bathroom to 
brush her hair.

Mulder smiled to himself.  She had prepared a very thorough 
list while in the truck.

They were dressed quickly and spent the next hour in companionable 
silence unpacking all the gear and packing it in the backpacks.  
Mulder took all the wrapping to the dumpster behind the motel and 
they swept the room for anything left behind.  Scully had located 
a free clinic where she could anonymously get the morning after 
pill and they left the room in search of the truck.  While walking 
there Mulder remembered the rain and hoped it wasn't sunk into 
the mud.  His wish was granted when the truck easily pulled out of 
the mud and along the rough trail scratching up the windows and cab 
as it emerged.  

Again he waited and held his breath as Scully went into the clinic.  
He hoped the wait was short, the questions were scarce, and the 
remedy easy to get.  He let out the breath he didn't realize he 
was holding two hours later when she emerged from the building.

"Everything okay?" he quickly asked as she got into the cab.

"Fine" she mumbled as she reached for her belt.

"What do you mean fine?  I'm going to need more than that Scully" 
he countered, anxious for news.

"I got a long lecture on safe sex, had to demonstrate how to pull 
a condom onto a wooden shaft, and was bombarded with pamphlets 
about STDs.  It was fine Mulder."

"And?"

"And the nurse thinks I got drunk and had an unprotected encounter 
with a guy from a bar who was gone by morning." she paused 
"I feel dirty all over just saying it again." 

"Sorry about that" he apologized for the awkwardness she had to 
endure.

"It's okay." she conceded "I took the morning after pill in her 
office and promised to come in for STD tests in a couple of 
days."

"Did you have to fill out any forms or give any ID?"

"Nope, that's why it's anonymous Mulder."

"That makes me a very happy man."

"I'm glad.  Now can we find a lake to dump this truck into?"

"Ahh, you're sweet-talking me again Scully."

**

Continued in Part 5