Si Hoc Legere Potes, Liberaliter Educatus
by Aloysia Virgata


DISTRIBUTION/FEEDBACK: aloysia.virgata@yahoo.com.

RATING: PG

CLASSIFICATION: Vignette

SPOILERS: The new promo vids

SUMMARY: Mulder and Scully see a therapist on Skinner's
orders.

DISCLAIMER: Not mine, Chris Carter, 1013, the usual.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Complete silliness based on the new promo
vids. A little mental vacation from the heavier stuff
I'm doing right now. Thanks to Scarlet for the idea!



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Allison Greer leans forward and looks at me earnestly.
Her long legs are crossed at the knee; one of her
dangerous stilettos dangling off the right foot. Even I
couldn't walk in those. But they're a welcome
distraction from this idiotic moment.

"Now Dana. Tell me what you miss about Fox."

I sink into the expensive white couch and long for Karen
Kosseff and her prudent frumpiness.

"I don't miss anything about him," I say. "He's right
here. This is pointless."

Mulder smirks. He had his turn already. "The way she
says my name. Yeah, I miss that." That jackass and
his gutter mind. He thinks this is funny, doesn't he?
With his precious psych degree. I hope he chokes on it.

"Daaaaay-nuh," coos Allison. "The purpose of this
exercise is to help you and Fox reconnect. To help you
get back in touch with what made your professional
relationship so strong."

"Guns," I say. "Ostracism. Rental cars. Death threats.
Government conspiracies. Do you want this alphabetized?"

"Maybe you should write a song," Mulder suggests
helpfully. "To the tune of Oklahoma."

"Shut up."

Allison runs a frustrated hand through her honey-colored
hair. 

"It was very important to Deputy Director Skinner that
you two meet with me. He felt that you two needed some
guidance before you could resume any kind of
professional partnership."

I grit my teeth. You're a dead man, Skinner. "Fine.
Let's get this over with. I miss...um..."

Mulder's watching me with a most amused expression. "My
boyish charm? My brilliant theories? My impeccable taste
in film?"

Allison gives him a stern look. "Fox! This is Dana's
time."

He feigns contrition. "Sorry, go ahead. *Dana.*"

I glare at him and turn to face Allison. I can do it if
I'm not looking at him.

"I miss...how much he challenged me. Knowing that if I
was in trouble,the chances were he was doing everything
in his power to come help me."

I fidget with the buttons on my cuff while Allison
beams.

"That's good! That's very good, Dana. You miss the way
Fox was always there to support and protect you. You
mentioned being challenged first; he mentioned your
intelligence. That really speaks to how much respect you
have for one another."

She glances at her watch.

"Well, I think today has been very productive. Mr.
Skinner is going to be so pleased! I'll see you both on
Wednesday. If you'll excuse me, I have a lunch
engagement." She glides from her office like a caramel
swan.

I stand awkwardly, not knowing where to look. Mulder's
eyes are shining with suppressed laughter.

"That was nice, don't you think? Very insightful. For
example, I never knew you liked being challenged. You
fake that really well."

"I fake a lot of things really well."

"Oh, baby. You cut me so deep."

I can't help laughing. "This was stupid."

"Incredibly stupid." 

"Well, it's over until Wednesday. Come on. I'll buy you
lunch."

He grins again. Lord help me, I did miss his boyish
charm. "Let's go egg Skinner's car."

"Even better."


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The End