Movie Day by Lolabeegood E-mail: lolabeegood@gmail.com Distribution: Anywhere as long as my name stays attached. Rating: R Category: S Keywords: Mulder/Scully, Post-series Spoilers: The whole series and all movies, although this takes place before IWTB Summary: A day in the life of Fox Mulder while living in long-term isolation. Author's Notes: This is part of my 'Day' series of stories. It can be read independent of all the others as they are only loosely linked. Enjoy! I do not own the characters or make money from this. ************************************** "Mulder, are you ready?" She called from the living room as she cued up the tape. He walked from their kitchen carrying a big bowl of popcorn with two beers under his arm. "There's butter on that popcorn, and I don't want to hear any complaints about it," he said as he sat down heavily. "Didn't you put some in a separate bowl first?" She asked as she walked around their coffee table. "Nope," he said as he twisted off a beer cap. "It's covered in butter," she said as she peered into the bowl. "I didn't get the edges very well," he said as he untwisted another bottle cap. "You might want to start there." "Gee, thanks," she said as he handed her a beer. "I can't eat it without butter, and you really want butter, you just feel bad about it," he said as he raised his beer to take a swig. "Fine," she smiled at him, knowing she would enjoy the popcorn more this way. "So," he clapped his hands together. "What have you got for me?" Scully took a drink from her bottle and went to stand in front of their TV. "For the double feature selection tonight, I have chosen two films which best demonstrate realistic characterization in the face of Hollywood plastic," she said primly. "Boooo," he yelled from the couch. "The first," she continued, ignoring him, "is a classic from the 1970's when..." "Show me your tits!" Mulder yelled from hands cupped around his mouth. "How old are you?" She finally asked, flabbergasted. "You mean my actual age, my intellectual age, my physical age, my emotional age, or my sexual age?" "Enlighten me," she said with a hand on her hip. "My actual age is forty-five as of six days ago. My intellectual age is somewhere around seventy, wise for my years but before the senility kicks in." For that he got a laugh from her. "My physical age is probably somewhere around forty, because I have managed to keep in shape and not have any blood pressure or glaucoma issues." "Maybe you stay physically young because you are a kept man," she offered. "I factored that into the equation," he smiled back at her. "Go on," she said with a sweep of her hand. "I know you want to." He leered at her for a moment and then continued. "My emotional age is probably around thirty-four, old enough to know the world doesn't revolve around me, but still immature enough to not want any major responsibilities." "You read some article in a psychology magazine and you've been just dying to tell me this, haven't you?" She asked as she walked over to sit next to him on the couch. "My sexual age," he continued, ignoring her comments, "is about thirty-six. Young enough to go the distance, confident enough in my abilities, but old enough to know how to please a woman." He finished his speech with his arms folded across his torso; quite pleased with what he's discovered about himself. "Is that it?" She asked, raising an arched eyebrow at him. "What do you mean? That took a lot of work." He said, slightly disappointed in her reaction. "Mulder that puts you exactly where you are," she said looking into his eyes. "Huh?" He asked confused. "Thirty-four, thirty-six, forty, forty-five, and seventy, is that right?" "Yeah," he said turning his body to look at her more fully. "The median value of those numbers is forty-five. Aren't you forty-five?" She asked with a big smile on her face. "Nobody likes a math geek, Scully," he said petulant in her rightness. "You brought numbers into this discussion, I only made sense of them. If you don't like the result..." "You mean I spent hours on those diagnostic activities for you to bring this down to median value?" He asked disappointed. "Do you feel more self-aware?" She asked as she rested a hand on his arm. "I don't need to feel patronized as well," he said looking sideways at her. "Can we get back to my movies?" She asked. "Yeah, fine," he said still scowling. "The first film is from 1978 and I remember seeing it in my mid-twenties when my mom rented it. My mom and I watched it one Friday night when I was home from med school and I remember it as the first really adult movie I watched. It stars Jane Fonda and..." "Hanoi Jane?" He interrupted. "Jon Voight and it's called 'Coming Home'" she continued her monologue "and it's about Vietnam and love and life and the characters were some of the first I remember speaking and acting like real people on film." "I haven't seen it before, it sounds interesting though," he acquiesced. "The second film is newer, it's from 1996 and it's an ensemble cast of young actors before they were big, including Matt Dillon, Uma Thurman..." "You had me at Uma," he giggled to himself. "I thought you'd like that one," she said slyly. "And it's an accurate portrayal of how men and women look at each other, talk to each other, and sometimes treat each other from the perspective of a group of small town friends." "Nudity?" He asked as he looked her up and down. "Maybe later, if you're good," she said as she hit 'play' on the VCR. "What, it's so old it's not even on DVD?" He asked as he made room for her next to him on the couch. "I had to borrow it from the library," she said as she took her seat next to him and his arm came around her shoulder. "This is great, Scully," he said kissing the side of her face. "It's hard to top 'Eraserhead' and 'Naked Lunch'," she mused. "Both excellent experimental films," he said as he shook her shoulder. "I'll go with experimental, but I differ on the excellence of them," she said turning back to the TV. "They both represent man's..." he started to explain. "Shhh," she said placing a finger over his lips, "the movie's starting." ************************************** The End.