Theatre of the Mind ~ Chinga

1. I want to play. Let's have fun!

2. Did she say Polly? Polly and her PollyDolly? Good Golly Miss Molly!

3. I hope there's an expiration date on those apparitions in the frozen food section.

4. That's the cart I always get at the grocery store.

5. Bob, we need a cleanup on aisle 2 . . . aisle 3 . . . aisle 4 . . . aisle 5 . . .

6. Put that knife away! You could put an eye out with that thing!

7. I hope Scully's *other* CD is Springsteen or the Stones.

8. TWC1: Who knew that Scully even owned a pair of jeans? I thought she threw them away after "Deep Throat". And obviously she must have borrowed those cool shades from Mulder.

9. Real women pump their own gas.

10. Leave it to math geek Scully to find a service station that sells gas by the liter rather than by the gallon. Perhaps this station caters to Canadian tourists.

11. It might surprise you two to learn that it's not really necessary to take a *vacation* on the weekend. Many people who have government jobs do not work on the weekend.

12. All the way to Maine for a weekend trip? Wow. So I'm guessing this is Saturday morning, and Scully hasn't been wasting her tourist-time. She already needs more gas and she's already had time to pick up and change into that "Maine - The Way Life Should Be" tee-shirt. I hope she bought Mulder a souvenir!

13. TWC2: Holy Flaming Cow! Let's get that out of the way right up front, shall we? Who can resist that bored little boy bouncing on his chair? Not I.

14. Action!Mulder from "Schizogeny" has been replaced by Adorable!Mulder in "Chinga." He doesn't have a lot of scenes, but he is just downright adorable in all of them!

15. Is it really necessary to wear a tie to the office on a Saturday?

16. Mulder should have learned the dangers of quoting highway statistics when Krycek tried the same song and dance with him way back in "Ascension."

17. Stephen King? THE Stephen King? He scares the heebee-jeebees out of me!

18. TWC3: I just love it when Mulder watches those tapes that aren't his. But this time it appears he's doing "research." Though he tells Scully he's watching "World's Deadliest Swarms," the empty video cassette box on his desk is entitled, "Alien Probe." (I shudder to think what parts of Mulder got probed on his alien excellent adventure.)

19. We got the "Mulder, it's me" but have to wait for the next Mulder!Moment to get the "Where are you?"

20. The question is when Mulder was fumbling with the remote, was he putting the TV on mute or stopping the tape? If he only muted, I guess he was telling the truth. But now his shirttail is hanging out. Exactly what was he doing?

21. Scully's sweet nothings about wicca, charms, bloodstones, etc., whispered in Mulder's ear are turning him on more than that tape that's not his.

22. MSRM: Dialogue we most want to hear repeated in Season 8: "Scully . . ." "Yes?" "Marry me." (And with any luck, Scully won't say, "Oh, brother.")

23. The colorful Detective Manners has retired to a coastal village in Maine? Well, he's lookin' at Scully like she's a bleepin' lunatic.

24. So in this town if you're pretty and single you're a witch? I'm surprised folks aren't wearing scarlet letters.

25. The hokey pokey? Can the chicken dance be far behind?

26. Well, hello dolly! (You knew that was inevitable, didn't you?)

27. "Maybe she wasn't afraid of something getting in. Maybe she's afraid of something getting out." I'm going to take a wild stab here and guess this is a clue.

28. Polly only goes for the good stuff. No nonfat tofutti rice dreamsicles for this kid. Let's have fun!

29. There's a "giving your cherries away for free" joke in here somewhere, but I can't quite seem to find it.

30. Guess that young counter lady whose scalp is now on sideways might want to reconsider the "no free seconds on cherries" policy now.

31. I'm not sure Jane lost her child care business because she slapped Polly. I think it might have been because she's just downright scary looking!

32. Scully seems compelled to tell everyone she meets that she's on vacation. Trying to convince herself, maybe?

33. The Forest Ranger says that winter is in full force up on the mountain, which would indicate that winter is still in medium force down by the seaside. And Scully is riding around in a convertible? In a tee shirt? She's gonna catch her death of pneumonia!

34. Who knew that your 45s could be labeled lethal weapons?

35. I just had a pretty scary thought: What if the hokey pokey *is* what it's all about?

36. That girl just loves her bubble baths, doesn't she? And how 'bout that nekkid leg door slam?

37. BTW, the classical piece Scully seems to love so much (since she's listening to it again) is Hummel's Piano Concert No. 3, Opus 89 (and there's that famous boom box!).

38. Seems that Scully has spared no expense on this weeken . . . er, I mean vacation. Room service and everything! Do you think she sprung for the pay per view?

39. Probably not, since she's reading "Affirmations for Women Who Do Too Much." And how funny that it's placed right beside that phone with its incessant blinking-like a neon sign flashing "Mulder"!

40. TWC4: Kudos to Scully on selecting something black and sexy; she can now prepare to do some funky poaching with Jack.

41. Mulder is so lonely he even tracks her down via police department cell phone! "Morning, sunshine!"

42. TWC5: Who wears short shorts? *He* wears short shorts! But does he have to wear that shirt with the long tail? It's hiding a nicely wrapped package, I'm sure. But I'll take dribbling Mulder in any way, shape, or form any day of the week!

43. I guess Mulder was so frightened by Scully's description of the Super Saver Eye-Gouging American Bandstand Spotlight Dance that he can't bring himself to go grocery shopping.

44. It's good to know that this little OJ incident didn't preclude Mulder from drinking from the carton in later years (see "Arcadia").

45. If you're a girl like me who likes to hear Mulder say "hullo," this episode is a dream come true!

46. Scully talking about "extreme possibilities"? She really *is* on vacation.

47. OT: This episode makes me wonder whatever happened to my good old Chatty Cathy doll.

48. "Oh, my God" is right. That is one big bleepin' lobster!

49. The boat is the "Working Girl" perhaps in honor of DD's debut as a par-tay-goer. The man on the boat was the old detective who helped M&S catch Eugene Tooms. (And of course, he was Captain Clancy on "Here Come the Brides" but you're all too young to remember that!)

50. The first time the doll's eyes flashed open it was a little scary, but now it's just getting redundant. And can't PollyDolly think of anything else to say? How about, "I'm on vacation."

51. Just what every kid wants for their birthday. The catch of the day.

52. I guess everybody gets "hooked" after they see PollyDolly!

53. TWC6: Hoo-boy!! First he's bouncing on chairs, now he's bouncing phone cords. Scully, please come home! He's not going to last another day without you!

54. "You mean like Chuckie?" Mulder's knowledge of fine cinema never ceases to amaze me.

55. But he can't resist poking her with that plastic ring and string joke which receives an eye roll and a shake of the head. ROTFLMAO.

56. If I were Melissa, I believe I would invest in some microwave popcorn.

57. Polly can't sleep? Maybe it's because of all the HAMMERING!!

58. Those Fast Flame matches just aren't cutting it.

59. Where's Mulder to kick in the door when you need him?

60. I believe this propensity for hitting yourself in the head with a hammer comes from listening to the hokey pokey 5,396 times.

61. LOL at Scully asking Polly *nicely* to hand over the Dolly. Grab that thing out of her hands, Scully, and run like hell!

62. I'm pretty sure Melissa is going to have Excedrin Headache No. 5,396.

63. You put the dolly in, don't take the dolly out, you put the dolly in, and you turn the temp about; you do the hokey pokey and you give a little shout, and that's what it's all about!

64. Don't touch those! They are finely calibrated pieces of investigative equipment.

65. Love the last M&S interaction as they each try to prove that they did just fine without the other. He doesn't want to let on how much he missed her, and she wants to imply that she had a swell vacation with a guy named Jack.

66. TWC7: "God, it's amazing what I can accomplish without incessant meddling or questioning into everything I do." Yeah, right. Busted!

67. We didn't really need to see CrispPollyDolly back and ready to play. Why couldn't they just end it with M&S and let sleeping PollyDollies lie?

68. What was the most important thing we learned from this episode? That "Chinga" is supposedly the equivalent of the F-word in Mexico? That the episode was called "Bunghoney" everywhere it was viewed except in the U.S. and Canada? To avoid talking dolls caught in lobster traps like the plague? That Mulder lettered in the Pencil Toss in high school? Nope. We learned that try as he might, Mulder is pretty much lost without Scully; he can't even keep his part of the "weekend apart" agreement. And try as she might, Scully is unable to get out of her own head or escape from Mulder's efforts to get her attention. Like it or not, they like to be with each other, they're dependent on one another, they care about each other, they're stuck with each other. And deep down, they love each other. Maybe they don't realize it yet, but they do.

Let me make one thing *perfectly* clear. Although I like popcorn, had a talking doll when I was a kid, and have been known to do the hokey pokey once or twice, my pen name is not derived from this episode. My "Polly" moniker comes from that sweet little girl who likes to play glad games, wins a dolly at a carnival, and finds the good in people. It is my polly-cy to be glad for the things in the XF that I have, rather than the things I have not, and to find the good in all XF episodes and explain to others why I see that good. Well, except maybe for "Teso Dos Bichos." "I think some things are better left unexplained."

Well naturally, I'm sending along my apologies because I know what each of you is thinking:

"I was hoping for something a little more helpful."