Theatre of the Mind ~ Dreamland

After I finished the TOTM for "Triangle," I realized one important thing: these things are getting too darn long. So I'm gonna make a concerted effort to keep them shorter and not run on and on and on and . . . well, you get the picture.

1. It's a beautiful moonlit night, a deserted highway. Maybe they're on a date! I'm all atingle!

2. Would that be Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek Voyager, or the original Star Trek?

3. The Groom Lake facility was officially designated Area 51 by the Atomic Energy Commission (AEC). The adjacent AEC proving grounds became known as the Nevada Test Site and divided into such numbered areas. The base is now known worldwide as "Area 51" though officially this designation was dropped in the 1970s. It is a secret installation that caters to the needs of testing the most advanced aircraft projects in the world, possibly even alien spacecraft.

4. I can tell that Mulder loved every minute spent in that car. Why does Scully want to get out?

5. TWC1: Woo-hoo! What is your point?

6. It's a normal life, all right, cause here come the intercepters.

7. A big woo-hoo for that soon-to-be Mulder footwear! And a nice shot of M&S in that bright light.

8. Schlameal! Schlamazel! Hazzen Pfeffer Incorporated! It's Lenny! Where's Squiggy?

9. An interesting tidbit about this episode: it started from an idea that it would be cool to have Garry Shandling guest star on the XF. From there, the script was written by the team of "John Gilnitz" with Shandling in mind for the part of Morris Fletcher. But when the time came to film "Dreamland," Shandling was not available, because he was in the middle of making a movie. So the part went to Michael McKean. What movie was Shandling filming? "Town and Country," with Warren Beatty, that just came out and tanked in the same week (maybe even the same day).

10. Mulder is finally inside Area 51. Now *he's* all atingle!

11. At last Mulder wears a wedding ring for a good reason.

12. Morris with Newt, the Reagans, and Saddam. All those good Republicans. So naturally he's worried about Scully being with someone who would hang with Republicans.

13. We all know that Scully knows Mulder as well as she knows the back of her own hand. So how many clues does she need to finally figure out that this is not the man she knows and loves?

14. Clue #1: Even though we know she's a real woman, Mulder would *never* ask Scully to pump her own gas. (And he'd never pass up the chance to answer a ringing cell phone.)

15. Clue #2: "Dana" and a pack of Morleys? (I think that really should have been enough clues.)

16. It's the little woman calling . . . I get the feeling Mulder's about to get out of the car.

17. Don't worry, Mulder. When you finally get to go home to Scully, you won't have that look of sheer terror. Only wedded bliss.

18. If I was Mulder, I would have clicked back to that first program. Looked like a cross between Benny Hill and Pee Wee's Playhouse.

19. They got the Playboy Channel. How bad could this marriage stuff be?

20. This must be the year of the Flowbee Hair and the Waggling Eyebrows. That's 3 eps in a row! (OT: Speaking of Number 3, thanks to Phantagrae for saying that she likes me third-best after Unbound and Theef. I consider that might elite company!! I'm Number Three!! Woo-Hoo!! [LOL!!])

21. Sometimes you're just between a rock and a hard place. And sometimes you speak in tongues.

22. Do you think I hate Kersh's assistant just because she *is* Kersh's assistant?

23. Clue #3: Mulder spilling his guts to Kersh *AND* agreeing with Kersh? What does it take, Scully, for this thing to come up and bite you on the ass?

24. Clue #4: Flirting with Kersh's assistant? Oh yes, he's always been so confident with the ladies.

25. Clue #5: A love slap on the butt? Did you think he missed the small of your back?

26. It's nice to know that when Mulder watches porn his only thoughts are of Scully.

27. TWC2: Hoo-boy! Bedhead!Mulder. Or would that be Barco-LoungerHead!Mulder?

28. Mulder, meet the family! What, no dog named Pat?

29. After meeting The Dysfunctionals, I'd be surprised if Mulder *ever* wants to get married.

30. But he's a natural at this husband and father stuff. Not. Well, practice makes perfect.

31. Personally, I would have said, you go ahead with that nose job, hon. Without delay.

32. Oooh, I just love the soap opera-ish music as Mulder tries to leave Joanne.

33. More eyebrows! He must be learning from the Master Eyebrow Manipulator, Dana Scully.

34. Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Johnny Cash: Well, you wonder why I always dress in black, why you never see bright colors on my back. And why does my appearance seem to have a somber tone? Well there's a reason for the things that I have on.

35. The Mulder/Fletcher Mirror Moment is too funny. Just one flaw. No tent action on the reflected Fletcher I was paying attention. (The mirror scene is an homage to and a re-creation of the famous mirror scene between Groucho and Harpo Marx in the classic 1933 comedy "Duck Soup," which was subsequently reenacted by Harpo and Lucille Ball in a famous 1955 episode of "I Love Lucy.")

36. From Johnny Cash to Jackie Chan in 0.6 seconds.

37. Hey, Grandma Top Gun, can you tone it down a bit?

38. Clue #6: Mulder as Tiger Woods? Come on. Mulder as Latrell Sprewell? That's something else.

39. GPM: There's something there, even when she doesn't know it's the real Mulder.

40. Clue #7: We go by the book? You learned that the book wasn't all it was cracked up to be way back in Season 1's "Young at Heart," 'member?

41. I see Mulder's conversion into another body hasn't made him a better tipper.

42. TWC3: It also hasn't curbed his appetite for sunflower seeds. He's so cute ripping open that bag.

43. Are those pictures of missing cats on the cash register?

44. If those Indian ceremonial burial things are supposed to ward off evil spirits, they're not working.

45. Aww, that's our Mulder! We know his first thought would be to save the injured.

46. Spare no expense on the explosions this year!

47. Clue #8: Mulder getting a little afternoon delight? He can't even get any nighttime delight.

48. Ewww, that contemptuous little "Agent Scully" from that tramp makes my blood boil!

49. Check up for mental illness: $250. Treatment for a massive head injury: $5,000. Look on Scully's face when he asks if she's out of her pretty little mind: Priceless.

50. Clue #9: He doesn't want to pursue an X-File? At least she's starting to realize something is wrong.

51. Sometimes your *lizard* is between a rock and a hard place.

52. I thought that tear in the space-time continuum was just something they made up for "Quantum Leap." Who knew?

53. TWC4: Mulder's not too happy to find out he might be stuck with his newfound family. But he looks good anyway.

54. Yes! Another appearance by the BIG ASS flashlight! Mulder keeps missing it!

55. I love that fused 11 cent piece. I'm glad Scully took that with her when she left for maternity leave.

55. Funny that since Scully got that by-the-book partner, *she* has sort of switched bodies with Mulder as well. She's concerned about "protecting the work," she balks at going by the book, she thumbs her nose at her boss's directives, and she "ditches" her partner to go investigate on her own.

56. He's still mumbling about Scully in his sleep? Hmmm . . . You know, Mulder, they have that pill now.

57. Love that goofy grin when he sees it's Scully at the door. Too bad Joanne had to slap it off his face.

58. So cute how he touches Scully's shoulder just as he normally would and she puts up that "back off, buddy" hand and flinches.

59. He knows what she's eating for lunch? Does that mean they're having lunch together? My shipper heart is going pit-a-pat!! (But bee pollen? Blech! That's like closing the hive door after the bee has grounded the ship with stinger interruptus.)

60. TWC5: Holy Flaming Cow!! It's good to know that (deep down) he hasn't changed. That's somewhat comforting. (Oooh, and that's a nice Mulder reflection in the rear view mirror.)

61. Oh-oh. He's about to be set up. By himself. Tattle-tale.

62. What a nice variation on the XF theme as Mulder steals the flight recorder. Kudos, Mark Snow.

63. Kersh is as condescending as his assistant. Have I mentioned that I don't like him?

64. Illuminating that Morley Lights sign is just adding insult to injury.

65. The ultimate betrayal. "Scully. You?"

66. Clue #10: "He's not me, Scully. Would I do this?" You know he wouldn't.

67. MSRM: Let's see, that was ten clues and she *finally* gets it. As Mulder is lead away, the realization dawns on her face. But at least you know in the conclusion of "Dreamland," MamaBear!Scully will be in major Mulder!Saving mode.

68. Ah, I'd love to wear a rainbow every day, and tell the world that everything's okay. But I'll try to carry off a little darkness on my back. Till things are brighter, I'm the Man In Black. And so is Mulder. For a little while longer. To be continued . . .

Gee, that wasn't much shorter, was it? I'm trying. These things take time. You're not going to be a Nazi about it, are you?

Well, my work here is done. Have a nice day.
And please accept my sincere apologies.