Theatre of the Mind ~ Trevor

1. Dear Diary: Tonight, my heart leapt when I stumbled on a showing of "Cool Hand Luke." Oh no! It's the X-Files!

2. You callin' me Charley potatoes? You better smile when you say that, pardner! (I have *no* idea why that's an insult, but I'm *sure* that's how guys in prison talk.)

3. More prison chit-chat: Well, I'm rubber and you're glue, what bounces off me sticks to you. I'd like to nail your ass to this wall, but your hand will have to do.

4. Dear Diary: I'm recalling these lines from "Cool Hand Luke": "You call the Captain 'Captain'...and you call the rest of us 'Boss', you hear?" "Any man don't keep order spends a night in the box."

5. Sorry, Pinker. I don't think you're in Mississippi anymore.

6. I've never seen quite as good an example of "divide and conquer."

7. The return of Squeamish!Mulder!

8. Arrest David Copperfield for that tower of fire thing last month. That's a good reason.

9. It took 40 minutes to kill him? I would have said a "half" hour, tops.

10. Dear Diary: Today my heart leapt when Agent Scully suggested spontaneous human combustion and this nice little flirting scene became the MSRM.

11. TWC1: Woo-hoo! Scully is right, Mulder. Just shut up.

12. Captain locked Rawls in the box and Rawls didn't want to be locked in the box. What we have here is failure to communicate.

13. Mulder buys her scientific theory for once even if he doesn't agree with it.

14. It would have been funnier if you'd had the exact outline of a man in the office wall a la Bugs Bunny and Yosemite Sam.

15. Rawls is supposed to be 34? I'd say prison is pretty tough on a guy.

16. The boys at 1013 just love to give Mulder those prison rape references. (But I'm not sure he put those condoms back in the box.)

17. Copy of "I Do". Yup, that's subtle.

18. I'm sorry. I just can't hate a man who realizes the importance of good footwear.

19. I like a store where you can get a new pair of sneakers in the same aisle as your canned goods.

20. Horn works ... try your lights.

21. The footwear wave! How come Mulder never does that?

22. The old crumbling handcuffs trick.

23. I bet Martha Stewart never thought of decorating with hubcaps. It's a good thing.

24. More prison talk: Sticks and stones may break my bones but bullets can never hurt me.

25. TWC2: Dear Diary: Today my heart leapt when I saw Agent Mulder in his shades and rolled up shirtsleeves. Holy Flaming Cow! And then he kicked in the door! More Holy Flaming Cow!

26. You know it's really Squeamish!Mulder when even *he* doesn't like sticking his fingers in that.

27. "Oh my God." We haven't heard one of those in a while.

28. Best Mulderism: "Don't recognize him from his driver's license, do you?"

29. Dear Diary: Mulder's got a theory; Scully is skeptical. I'm gonna miss that. :::sniff:::

30. Gee, it must have been craft day on the Rosie O'Donnell Show. June, why are you going to all the trouble of making those flowery baskets when hubcaps will do the trick?

31. Lucky Jackie got to wear the trailer park trash outfit.

32. Was Pinker in a nudist prison colony?

33. Scully gets to kick in the door this time ... it's equal opportunity kicking. Um, but what happened to knocking first? I know; bust the door down first, ask questions later.

34. Hooray for the Little Ass Flashlights! I just love seeing them come through a door like that!

35. Well, *I* want Fox Mulder but I don't go around writing it on doors. Much.

36. TWC3: Dear Diary: Today my heart leapt when Agent Mulder stuck his foot through the door and the dresser and it hung there for just a brief moment.

37. Note to 1013: We got it from the lingering shot of the trunk. You didn't have to show us Nekkid!Rawls in there. And what's up with the light being on in the truck when it was closed? Now I'm going to be up all night wondering if my refrigerator light has been fooling me all these years.

38. The return of Lariat! Whew! I thought perhaps M&S had found another rental company.

39. Guess "stand by your woman" is not a popular phrase in Ole Miss.

40. Wow! Pinker provides a whole new definition of road rage.

41. A down payment on a house, two sofas, chintz curtains, and a PC. Boy, $90,000 sure doesn't go as far as it used to.

42. But a high price to pay for another chance. Goodbye, Robert.

43. I sure hope M&S took out the extra insurance. It'll be tough to explain that trunk damage.

44. Oh, I get it! Pinker can go through walls but his clothes can't. Gosh, that almost makes too much sense! (And did you notice how is hair is always pulled straight back after he does his walking through walls routine? Nice detail.)

45. OT: Sure looks like June made a lot of nice wreaths with her glue gun and silk flowers.

46. TWC4: I would have written "Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?" Yum.

47. Scully, I sure hope you studied for this physics quiz.

48. M&S are pretty knowledgeable about hospital codes that have to do with pregnancy. I'd like to know why.

49. No calls. No cigarettes. No glue guns allowed. There are all kinds of prisons.

50. Pretty cool effect. I hope that Pinker is coming through the roof and not a room above. Otherwise, whoever stays in that room next is gonna get a big surprise!

51. Footwear! (I could have said "an arm and a leg" but that would have been a cheap shot!)

52. It appears that Rawls "disarmed" the Deputy. (Or maybe June did in a nicotine frenzy.)

53. Maybe you guys can put that on ice for Krycek. Oh, darn. He needs a *left* doesn't he?

54. I don't like to brag, but I was just a bit ahead of Moose & Squirrel on this one. As soon as they started talking about the child being adopted, I knew just where the child was. Don't feel bad guys, you'll get the hang of this investigating stuff sooner or later.

55. I think the folks who done Jackie's wardrobe musta picked this song too. Yee-haw.

56. FYI: The character of Trevor was named for John Shiban's nephew.

57. Rawls and June make for a pretty interesting contrast. The convict Rawls believes that God arranged it so he'd know he had a son, as well as the means to find him, and that's all he wants. And Martha Stewart-wannabe June basically sold out her former boyfriend and her son so that she could have a chance at a "normal" life. Four walls do not a prison make, nor iron bars a cage.

58. GPM: Not with each other, but I love the Dueling Cellphones.

59. Mulder shows Scully his rubbers. Oh come on. You knew that one was inevitable, didn't you?

60. It's teamwork with a capital T. Even the light bulbs above their heads come on at the same time!

61. Mulder hasn't had much luck lately trying to call people and warn them about impending danger.

62. Chicken noodle. Mmmm, mmmm, good.

63. I don't think I want to know why you'd need a lock like that on the outside of the pantry door.

64. "You can call me Pinky." Um, sure, that fits, but I don't think so.

65. Pretty cool as the soup passes right through "Pinky". But thank God for Visions, huh?

66. TWC5: Dear Diary: Today my heart leapt when I saw Shotgun!Toting!Mulder pop around that corner. Hoo-boy!

67. But why no shotgun for Scully? Wouldn't it have been more prudent to have both of them armed with riot bullets? (It was just a thought.)

68. Mulder said earlier that Rawls seems to find shooting to kill annoying. He's not heeding his own advice.

69. Pulse!Taking!Mulder, you forgot to shout: "Call the paramedics!"

70. I'm not exactly sure why M&S parked so far away, except that it made running for the car more dramatic. And how come they didn't bring more backup? Only one set of rubbers for the whole county?

71. Scully dropping her keys makes me laugh. Since when have they locked their car since "Fire" in the first season? (I guess maybe cause they parked so far away, they had to lock it.)

72. Pretty smart to run into the conveniently located phone booth. Another reason to park in Timbuktu.

73. Nice moment as Pinker stops his pursuit when he sees the terrified eyes of his son. He's not such a bad guy after all. He does just want what's his.

74. A pretty cool effect as Pinker becomes road kill. Sometimes you're the windshield, sometimes you're the bug.

75. If you can't have a footwear closeup to close out an episode, a closeup of those long, elegant fingers will also do nicely.

76. Well, I wasn't quite as swift as Moose & Squirrel on that last line. I have to admit this is the first time I've noticed that Mulder was throwing June's own words back at her when he said that maybe what Pinker wanted was another chance. That's all June said she wanted when explaining why she spent the money she found. I guess it is important to pay attention.

77. Since this episode is all about second chances, I hope this means that M&S are going to get a second chance as well. Their relationship has recovered nicely from the wedge driven between them in "Two Fathers/One Son," and the lack of continuity from the movie to "The Beginning." Will they get their "second chance" before this season is over? Well "at the risk of further ridicule," my answer is a resounding "yes."

78. I guess that everything is relative. I didn't much care for this episode when it first came out, but I enjoyed it a lot more this time. I guess I'm getting nostalgic for episodes like this one: great M&S interaction and communication, a pretty interesting and spooky X-File, good performances by the leads and the guest stars, and cool special effects. And of course knowing now that while we may have the interesting/spooky X-Files, good performances, and cool effects, we *won't* have the M&S interaction well, let's just say that absence is already making my heart grow fonder. In fact, I was so nostalgic, I went back and read my diary entry of April 11, 1999, when this episode first aired.

79. Dear Diary: Today my heart leapt when I wrote to 1013 about the X-Files. I told them two things. (1) If you have the need to show us anyone nekkid in a future X-Files episode, please make sure that it is Agent Mulder. And (2) I believe that as an X-Files fan I am entitled to certain inalienable rights where Mulder and Scully are concerned, and I'm just giving you fair warning. "I Want What's Mine."

Apologies to "Cool Hand Luke," Paul Newman, Martha Stewart, Rosie O'Donnell, Lariat, Alex Krycek, and ... oh, "I'm sorry I even brought it up."